…made sweet, sweet music – but that’s not always the case with our own parents.

Culturally, there’s an expectation that our parents will love us unconditionally, raise us carefully, and wisely guide us into adulthood. Parents are human though, with their own wants and weaknesses, and often, have had their own messed up childhood.

Many of us have turbulent and miserable childhoods because our parents simply weren’t up to the job - and instead of raising us as happy, confident and empowered adults, they installed fear and limitations, and we had experiences that left us damaged, when we should have been protected.

The damage can be subtle, it can show up as a lack of self-confidence, an inability to put ourselves first, or to reach our potential. The damage can also be more obvious, PTSD, anxiety, depression, phobia, toxic relationships, addiction, self-harm, and suicide. There are a thousand ways our parents harm and hobble us, and all damage, however subtle, can blight the whole of our lives.

There is no ‘Parent School’, none of us is trained in this critically important skill-set – parents must figure out how to do it as they go, and they often base it on their own imperfect parents or get it wrong in other ways.

I am a product of parents who got it very wrong, and so are many of my clients. They come to me with problems in their relationships, and with their self-esteem; they are often full of negative self-talk, repeating things their parents told them decades ago. My clients are often very conflicted about dealing with these issues because it’s hard to admit that the parents you love messed you up, and they are afraid that dealing with the issues will damage the relationship they have with their parents now.

Fortunately, it’s absolutely possible to explore damage from our childhood, heal from it and become stronger, without risking our relationship with our parents. It’s all to do with the NLP presupposition that everyone is doing the best they can with the resources they have at the time. After working with me, my clients are able to forgive their parents whilst protecting themselves from further damage, leaving them more able to have a happier relationship with their parents moving forward, or to let them go with ease.

If you’d like to know more about how I can help you with this issue, book in a Time For Me Chat x