Put simply, making a successful change is:

a)    Working out what’s wrong

b)    Finding a solution

c)    Carrying out that solution from then on

Easy-peasy right? No. Our unconscious mind does not like to do things differently, change equals a possible threat – it likes us just to pootle along as we always have done, even if it’s making us miserable, because staying in your lane is safe.

My programme changes lives – sounds like a brag, I know. But it’s what my clients tell me, and it’s not ME who changes their lives, my clients are doing it for themselves, in the very best way for them as unique and wonderful human beings. I do help a bit though, because change isn’t just ABC. Actually, it’s a) (i), a) (ii) etc, because there are certain ingredients needed to do A, B and C successfully – and these are what I teach.

My clients are mostly women and for most of us, making change is hard. In order to work out what’s wrong in our lives, we have to spend time with ourselves, pondering this – ‘how do I make time for that? I barely have time to use the loo!’ In order to find a solution, we have to scroll through our options until we find the best one – ‘what options? My life is as it is, I have to get the kids to school, I have to be there for my partner, I have to pay the bills – these things are not optional’. Then, we have to choose a solution – ‘choose? How do I choose? I always make choices with my partner, what if my choices impact those I love?’ Once the solution is chosen, my clients then have to ‘live’ that change and that often involves a change to routine in their work or homelife, they need to advocate for themselves and have healthy boundaries – ‘healthy what now? No, you don’t understand, if I asked my partner to do more at home he’d sulk, he’d do it all wrong and then I’d end up having to do it all anyway, it’s easier to just do it myself’. And on top of all this, these amazing, busy, unhappy women have to first make the decision to come and see me – ‘ooh! That’s the hardest one, maybe I’m exaggerating things, things will probably improve in time, I just can’t spend that much on me, it's selfish’.

Let me just be clear, my women clients are strong, they are awesome, they are resilient – they must be to have put up with what they’re putting up with for so long. They are savvy and often successful in many areas of their lives, but they are up against hundreds of years of patriarchy, being socialised to put others first, to be nice, to be quiet. This patriarchy may not even exist in their external lives, they may have great people around them, but those outdated values are inside many of us women, and this is what prevents us from being able to be objective, confident, and self-compassionate. We recognise pain and suffering in others waaaay before we recognise our own.

So the reason my programme changes lives, is because my clients learn how to see their options, make decisions, and stand up for themselves with confidence – which not only helps them with the current change they’re making, but with future changes in every area of their life.

If you are currently going through turbulent change, or you desperately want to make a change in your life, but keep ending up back where you started, book in for a free chat here.